27

Today is 8/24. Today is my day. Today is the day my beautiful mother fell in love and knew she had a best friend forever. The first day my Daddy’s heart truly melted. Today is my birthday! *Inhales and exhales blissfully.* It’s something about this 27 y’all. I love it. I love the feeling that it has given me. I’ve never felt like this before. I didn’t even feel like this when I was pregnant for my 26th birthday. Maybe every birthday before this I always wondered will I have, that? Every single candle that I have blown out up until my 27th birthday I wished for this. Family. My family. My husband. My daughter.

My husband kissing me and telling me “Happy Birthday baby.” With a finishing touch of “You don’t know how much I love you, do you?” *I’m smiling.* My daughter jumping up and down on the bed and on me smiling, drooling, and laughing. Not because it’s my birthday though. She’s so oblivious. It’s our normal morning routine. But it makes me happy. All of it.

*Sigh* So many moments take me back to then. Songs mostly. The weather too. Sometimes the air is so crisp, the leaves are falling off the trees and every color is beautiful. The chimney. Dinner is cooking. And your nose is cold. Those things make me feel like I’m there in that moment. Those moments, when I wondered would I have what I have now.

So may holidays and birthdays I was not lonely but I was so alone.

I know God is real. I know He is. I really do believe that God is up there and I am down here and my name, my name  is in the palms of his hands and He is here to help me. Because when I tell you that I prayed. I did. I prayed every day. I prayed every night. *eerrr, I get choked up* And now I see it. Right here in front of me in the flesh. I can touch it. I can feel it.

I remember the days when things were so close but yet so far. Thank you Jesus!

Happy Birthday Me! Happy Birthday 27!

P.S. It’s my party, and I’ll cry if I want too.

I’m Just Saying…