Article 16

My Favorite Sceneries

Okay, so, I guess I’m out doorsy, but then again, I’m not. For those who know me know, that I love to walk. I love to walk around, take in the air, and stretch my legs. Ya know, feel good stuff. The jobs I’ve always had required a lot of walking. I’ve been a waitress/server half my life. I’ve also been in the medical field half my life too. Between volunteering and actually getting paid, I’ve put some miles in at the hospital. I’m a busy body. I’m not going to say, I couldn’t. But I will say, I prefer a job where I am moving around. I wouldn’t want to be sitting down all day, ya know. Like, sitting in front of a computer, something like that. I be low aggy when I blog for a certain number of hours a day.
Once again, I done ventured off. (Ha-ha.) I promise, I stay telling a thousand stories in one. But yeah, I love to walk. I like to go out and get some fresh air and take in the scenery.
(Let me just get into it, I feel like I am all over the place Chile.)
Carnivals. I absolutely love how carnivals look at night. All the lights. The ferris wheel lights are my favorite. (I love the smell of a carnival too. Funnel cake.)
Skyline. When we drove across country. We’ll let me make myself clear. When Rob drove across country. Driving up on the skylines was my favorite part.
Mountains. I love where I live now. Just off the scenery alone. The mountains look good, whether the sun is rising or setting.
The ocean. What better scenery is there than the beach right? The endless water, and how the sky and the water meet. (The sound of course is out of this world.)
Christmas lights!! I love to see lit up Christmas décor during the Christmas holiday. It gives you that feeling you know. I love how downtown looks during the Christmas holiday. That one huge tree that stands in the middle of everything.
So, yeah. Those are the sceneries that I enjoy seeing.
Some of them bring back memories from years and years ago. And some memories, not so long ago.
It’s nothing like taking in a good scenery.

I’ve Been in Love Four Times in My Life.
1. The day I fell in love with Jesus. Awh man. What a relief. Life, oh life can take you down and try and keep you under. I’ve been helpless and hopeless all at the same time. Useless is how I felt. But when I know I can rely on someone to keep me sane when the devil wants me to go insane is solace to me.
As a child, my brother and me went to church. I enjoyed it. I was in the youth choir, and I was a usher. I was in plays and stuff. I remember praying as a little girl. I’ve always been a prayer, my whole life. I understood it when I was little, but I didn’t comprehend it. I just knew that prayer helped, but I didn’t know to what extent. I knew to always walk by faith, and not by sight. As a little girl I knew this. I would always pray for my family and friends. Then when I 22 years old, I walked in my church, with a heavy heart and the world on my shoulders. Ever since that day, there’s been a better part of me. By no means am I perfect. But I will live my life always trying to be better than the day before. I aim to not make the same mistakes over and over again while I say I’m sorry. I am thankful. I am grateful. And I trust God. He is the reason for the season. I am way to happy to be lucky. I’m Just Saying…
2. Myself. Chile. Talk about getting to know people. We’ll getting to know me wasn’t the easiest task either. Talk about hell and high waters. And I am still learning. Getting to know the root of me was not fun. It’s one thing to be disappointed in other people, but to be disappointed in yourself in like a train wreck. Knowing self is major key. I didn’t understand it then, not like I do now. I just wanted to be in a relationship so bad, I wanted to be married sooo bad. I felt like I would get up one time, and get knocked down ten, because everything in my life was based upon that. Having someone to love and me loving someone back was the only thing that made me feel like I could be me. But let me tell you, I love when my husband tells me he loves me, and shows it. I love when my husband tells me I’m beautiful after I wash my hair and wake up with it sticking straight up on my head because I done let it air dry. But to know that I am loved whether he loves me or not, is amazing to me. To know that I am just as beautiful, when I say it, means a lot to me. It speaks volumes. All I’m going to say is, BELIEVE ALL THE HYPE WHEN THEY SAY, YOU CAN’T LOVE ANYONE ELSE IF YOU DON’T LOVE YOU FIRST. And that, my friend, is the second person I fell in love with.
A lot of people don’t even know themselves. When they talk about themselves, they describe different people as their personal characteristics. They’re very much aware of their good traits, but not their bad traits. Take the time to get to know YOU. Get to know who YOU are in all aspects. It’s important. It’s a need. Don’t be afraid to show your scars. That way, other people will know they can heal too.
3. My husband. Aye. That black man. I fell in love at a young age, hit me right upside my head I feel like. I didn’t understand it. I didn’t know how to receive it or give it when I first felt it. It was foreign. All the times I thought I was in love and wasn’t. Don’t misconstrue, lust with love Chile, it’s a difference. It is a million and one reasons why I fell in love with this man. No, really. I could write a novel about him. ‘If I wrote a book about where we stand. The title of my book, would be, “Life with Superman.” That’s how you make me feel…’ -Beyonce’. But instead, I will just tell the truth in the simplest form. He makes me feel like number one. He makes me feel like I won the championship game when everyone else thought I would lose. He makes me feel like, ‘I wish that I could have this moment for life.’ He makes me feel like the starting line up at the pep rally during homecoming. He makes me feel like the captain of the cheerleading squad. He makes me feel like a NY Best Seller. He makes me feel, he just makes me feel. Everything that I have experienced in life, he makes it ten times better. And everything I thought I missed out on, he proved to me to be a mistake. I love him.
4. Naomi. My doll baby. Awe man. I fell in love with my daughter the day I took that pregnancy test and it said, positive. That moment right there, I was in love. I instantly felt the urge to protect. I became selfless, right at that moment. Even before I saw her whittle face. I fell in love with her. There is no love like a mother’s love. ‘Ugh. Just so amazing.’

Love is a beautiful thing. Love doesn’t hurt people, people hurt people. You gotta understand the difference. Heck, I had too. God is love. We rely on people too much, too much! Folks don’t want to believe in Jesus, but will continue to believe a person who is full of lies, AND YOU CAN SEE THE LIES, LOUD AND CLEAR. Insane. Be careful of the battles you chose. It ain’t always the devil Chile. People will lie to you and take you right to hell with them, and here you go, trotting right on to hell with them. Ain’t asking no questions or nothing. Just down for whatever and whoever and then get mad at love like love did something to you. So, when you gone check the person though? Half the time, and lets be real folk, lets be real. Half the time folks be looking for gallon love in pint size tail people. And you be knowing that they ain’t gallon worthy with they pint size self. But you go right on ahead and love up on that pint size love while you giving up gallons of love. But if you stopped and  looked, and took time to fall in love with yourself, you would know that you ain’t gots (No Typo.) to pour into anyone for them to pour into you. READ THAT AGAIN. Be who you want to be with. Slow down, read that again to understand it. BE, WHO, YOU would want to be with. Shoot. Some women out here, men too, looking for a perfect person, but they all jacked up. Self-awareness. One time, I had the nerve to want Rob to be a certain type of way, when I was bat (You know what) crazy. If he treated me, the way I treated him, I would have never married him. And that ain’t right. If I didn’t wat to be treated like that, then what okayed it for me to act like a zoo monkey? See, ya gots to check yaself I’m glad I did. Cause I bout almost lost my blessing! Ask yaself could you marry you, for real. Could you be your best friend for real.

I’m Just Saying….

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