I Guess I’ll Start Here

Hey Chile! Long time no hear from I know.

So yeah, we’re home, back in Virginia. We had to take an emergency leave. I’ll tell you about that later. We flew out last Wednesday, June 6th, and we’ve been rolling ever since. I’ve been waaaay out of the loop Chile. Waaaay out of the loop. Life done got real, real quick . Like, no for real.

*Inhale*

*Exhale*

Sigh.

So, listen. For those who don’t know, I have thee (Not the, but thee.) worse motion sickness ever! Like, whhhhhhy Lord?!The pain and the agony. I just be straight up miserable. I’m trying to tell you, if you don’t get sick in a car, a boat, a plane, or a train, then you’re a blessed traveling somebody. Me on the other hand, be over there busting bullets out for    sweat. My little family gone (I’m so country.) leave me right at home. I mean, come on now! I’m a Marines  wife and I can’t travel! That just makes no dang since. ‘What in the ham sandwiches, black biscuits.’ I can’t go no where without… restraining from earling on my husbands lap, breaking into cold and hot sweats, ears pop, locking, and dropping, head banging like snare drum, and some mo mess. Chile! The struggle is for real, for real. Not to mention knowing what we were coming home too. I was just all types of tore up.

ICE! ICE AND A BOTTLE OF COLD WATER ARE THE TWO KEY COMPONENTS IN THIS DREADFUL ORDEAL! 

When things get real spinny, I need ice. And lots of it!!

When it gets too deep, I need that bottle of water on the back of my neck. ASAP.

This mess is cray-zeee! I mean, if I can’t walk there, I’m about done for! Oh my goodness, just the thought of getting on a Yacht makes me want to lay down instantly. I’ve never thrown up (Yet.) from motion sickness. But I think a boat will send me just about over.

I realize that my motion sickness has gotten a lot worse since I’ve gotten older. What’s up with that? I’m taking my sick tail to the doctor before I get back on a plane!BELIEVE THAT! I need a volume or something! I’ve been traveling my whole life, literally. From being a military brat, to a grown woman who loved to travel, to marrying a Marine. #Him. And now my butt can’t do not a thang if it ain’t on foot. Now that, is just lame! Ugh. I can’t stand it.

My husband thought I was being a little ‘extra’ one time we were going home, coming from Vegas, which is three hours from we reside in California. (California ♥️) I yelled, “PULL THIS CAR OVER NOW SO I CAN BREATH!! Sometimes, all jokes aside, to talk is painful. Y’all think I’m lyinh. Motion sickness is a motha. Chile. I was so messed up in those mountains trying to get home. My ears were popping like pop rockets and extra butter flavored pop corn. Chile! Jesus be a fence.

How is that my two year old can do better than me, when it comes to this traveling thing? I mean, better me than her, but dang!

This was Naomi’s first plane ride, and she took it like a G! Meanwhile, this is my fiftieth time flying and I’m in the seat slumped over looking like a strung out meth addict, wit a crack addiction, with a laid bun. And I do mean laid. That Ecco gel ain’t nothing but the truth. It doesn’t matter at the end of the day though. This humidity will take you and ya hair-do down. Just one more thing that makes us want to stay on the West coast. But we’ll get to that another time.

Folks were on the plane dranking like they were in a competition with one another. Heck, maybe they were trying to relax, i don’t know. Me!!! I ain’t dranking NOTHING! I already feel intoxicated. Like that time when you had juuust a little too much, and your praying that God spares ya life just one more time, because this is your last time drinking anyways. Yeah, that’s me with motion sickness.

Like, I can’t drink nothing, nothing but some water Chile! If I’m lying I’m flying and God knows I don’t want to be flying, so. Hahaha! That’s the problem.

Hold up! HOLD UP! Wayment!!! DID I TELL YOU I LEFT MY LAP TOP AND PLANNER AT THE AIR PORT!!!???

Chile let me tell! It has been a run honey! But God is good always and still!! And after all that’s taken place in the past week and what will still take place from here on out! The heck with it all! BUT, dog on. Right? All I know is that we made it! Dog gone flight got delayed. We got to DC and hit the ground running. I left my lap top and not my kid. God is good! #NothingHappensForNothing I reckon a new lap top will be coming around the mountain soon. Until then, I’m still going to be chatting away! If there is a will, there is a way. And God always makes a way. So, I ain’t even going to trip. I even surprised myself at how I didn’t mope (Did I spell that right? Anyways.) & complain about my lap top. But when life happens, those kind of things fall down by the waste side ya know. And I have never known that more in my life until last Thursday, June 7, 2018. 

So, yeah Chile. I’m a mess down bust down on a plane, and everything else. If I ain’t driving, I’M SICK! I do have a 60/40 chance in the car. Since I’ve been married I don’t really drive anymore. Seriously, Rob takes me everywhere. I’m cool with that. Heck, I enjoy it. I’ll drive to the nail shop every now and then and again. But other than that…I’m a shot gun rider. When I’m driving, I’m good. Like, good good. But I don’t drive. Idk, maybe we will switch seats. (Haha. Who am I kidding.) Robs like,  “Yeah, right.” (Tee-Hee.)

SIDE BAR…

How the heck do you drink a cup of coffee and then take a nap? Wake up, drink some more coffe and go back to sleep?! (Rob.) I mean, where they do that at? How do you even do that? A cup of coffee for me is like having a margarita first thang in the morning. I drink my coffee black, (Duh.) because I ain’t in it for the taste. I need it to WAKE UP! And here he goes and drinks coffee and goes to sleep. Naomi slept good too. Here I am, making conversation with the locals (Folks sitting around me.) trying to keep from passing out while my whittle familia is sleep.

Listen, let me tell you something. When they plane was landing it was bittersweet! The take off and landing is the worse already as it is! But I was glad as ever to be landing!! Shoot! Talk about kissing the ground! Then folks want to stand and talk like it’s a dog on party! GET YOUR STUFF AND GET OUT! Get off the plane yo! It was on the tip of my tongue! Chile, I sprinted off that plane! I sure did. I didn’t look back once.

But just when I thought that was bad…

‘Ma, I’m coming home….’

xOxO.

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