Nothing will ruin your twenties more than thinking you should have your life together already!
Stop fearing age!
Live it. Enjoy it. Learn from it. Years bring memories. Years bring wisdom. Years is a blessing.
Why do we try and pack everything into our twenties? Is it society? The opinions of people? I mean, what is it?
Why do we jokingly say, or not, “I’m old.” when we’re in our thirties? I know you’ve seen it somewhere or heard it from somebody you know or don’t know. Or heck, maybe you’ve said it! I will be thirty years old next month and I feel like I’m just getting started. I am so amped about my thirties and all I will learn in it and from it. My twenties broke me, shaped me, taught me, revived me, and then some Chile! With each year of my twenties I have grown in so many forums. I might not be exactly where I want to be YET, but good God knows I ain’t where I used to be! And I am more than thankful for that. Words can’t even begin to explain! The older I get the more excited and grounded I get. About everything! My goals, unfinished achievements, and then some. I’m living my life, learning from it all, and checking off the list as I go. Not stunting my age. But listen, I haven’t always thought or felt like this. I remember being twenty-two and twenty-three thinking I was running out of time! Like seriously! My life was just getting started and I already felt like it was over because I didn’t have certain things on my checklist checked off at a certain age of my life.
The blueprint of my life was not want society or whoever and whatever said it was supposed to be. Neither was it what I thought it would be. And I say, thought because I look back and understand why things happened the way they happened. Some things I wasn’t mentally equipped for then. I can say that. Some situations I would’ve been built for then. I’m thankful things happened when they did and how they did. Oh, I gots a future story to tell you about timing Chile.
I’ve had several conversations with framily and close associates that feel like they’re running out of time because they don’t have children, or they aren’t married, and don’t have a potential candidate in sight. What’s makes us feel like we’re supposed to have all that in our twenties though? Why do we feel like we’re too late in our thirties? And I’m speaking from personal experiences, because that was me too! However, I am married now. I have been for four years, I have a daughter, and one on the way. But guess what?! I’m twenty-nine and still trying to get my dog on bachelors degree! In all truth that has been my biggest struggle since I’ve graduated high school. Even after I got my most requested prayer. Which is my family. My degree has always been something that I have aspired for and desired to have. The thought of not having it was like a monkey on my back. It weighed me down mentally. I’m not to receptive to unfinished business.
Why don’t I have something I’m supposed to have at the age of what, twenty-one? It took me to now, the age of twenty-nine to be comfortable and accepting of my story, my life! I’ve been working on me for some years now. Especially after having my daughter. Life has been good. But something about this twenty–nine has been liberating and fulfilling. I will be a full time student come August. And I am so happy I could just bust out a eight count dance routine. I’m not just happy because I’m finally finishing something I started years ago. I’m happy because the logic and acceptance I have about the whole ordeal mentally means more to me than you can even understand. I’m not going back to school because I have to have something to fit in to what is supposed to be. I’m not going back to school because I feel like I’m running out of time. Nor am I trying to catch up or keep up. I’m doing this because I have become one with me! I’m so proud of my inner peace that I thank God for having things clearly happen how they were really supposed to happen. I am right where I’m supposed to be. To be a mom, wife, and a progressive, productive me, makes me so so proud! I want to show my girls that you can love the hell out of a man, have your babies, and get the job done while still living out your dreams. I feel like a bad mama jamma knowing I wear many hats on top of being a full time college student. This is so new to me. I’ve never been a college student while having so many other responsibilities. And now that I have a true inner understanding of what and why I want certain goals. I can get the job done effectively. I used to run in circles. Talking loud and saying nothing! Busy and doing absolutely nothing. And getting nothing but a headache out of all of it.
Ya know what? I used to be someone who was neva eva satisfied. The more I got. The more I wanted. I got married and started a family which was one thing I wanted the most in this here world. Got that and before I could settle in that, I’m worried about things that weren’t meant to break me down. I went from not feeling like I had enough, to feeling like I wasn’t enough. Chile! I tell ya! And for the record none of that had anything to do with my husband. Because I am no longer a ungrateful (You full in the blank.) I realize that I have heaven here on earth. My family. I’m so in love. My detrimental state of mind had everything to do with me. My thoughts, my insecurities, and my ungrateful behind. You know folks that’s just ain’t eva satisfied? Welp, that used to be me. So ungrateful and unthankful. Because to keep it, (What they say?) a buck with you! There is nothing more important to me than my family. If I had a choice of choosing my family over a lot of the goals I want to achieve. I would always chose my family first. No hesitation! Not even a inkling of a thought. Because when I say this I mean this with every fiber in me. There is nothing more important to me than being a mom, a parent. So when I would check myself and ask myself profound questions about my thought process. I came to the conclusion that my thoughts came from what everyone else thought of me and not what I thought of myself.
If you’re in your twenties and you feel like you’re running out of time, YOU’RE NOT!! You’re just in time! You’re exactly where you need to be. Trust the process. Trust yourself. But mostly, trust God! Set goals! Be productive! Of course, don’t get comfortable. But learn how to be content. You get what I’m saying? There’s a difference. Don’t feel like you have failed because you haven’t reached your due date. Don’t get discouraged because what you see is far fetched. Chile you better walk by faith and not by sight!
Also! Do ya own thang! Be good at that! Don’t worry about what you think you’re supposed to have figured out and have right now. Enjoy life. Embrace living in itself. I’ve heard people say, “I’m old” at the age of thirty-three to the age of sixty-five. But if they dropped dead right now they would be considered young. Don’t pick and choose life. Live it. For instance people try and say having a baby in your thirties is too old. Sooo, I guess having kids at fifteen and sixteen and younger is okay? *Please don’t take that personal for anyone who became a parent as a teenager. I mean that sincerely.* I’m just trying to make a point. Do not allow other peoples thoughts and opinions of the timing of your life distract YOU from living in your timing!
Half the people I’m close to have graduated and are in school still getting certified, or prospering in their careers. Me, I’m working on all that at twenty-nine years old Chile! Some of them want to be settled with a family and they’re not. I’ve accomplished that, but are either one of us doing better than the other, HECK NO! Did any of us do anything wrong? HELL NO! This is us. This is our individual stories. This is our life. Time will have folks more choked up about prospering than anything in this world. God doesn’t look at time. He said in His word, ‘Therefore don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.’ Matthew 6:34. Meanwhile, we count each year as failure when something doesn’t get done or go right according to our age and stage in life. Chile! You better live!
Celebrate every birthday! I don’t give a dog on if you’re turning hundred years old and you have to blow out a Glade candle to make a wish! Life is a gift. Life is a blessing! That sooo many people have been cut short of.
Your twenties will be awkward as eva. You’ll be too old for this and too young for that. You’ll make plenty of mistakes. Just keeping living!
I’m Just Saying…
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