Trust me when I say, everythang that I am about to say to you in this here blog. I’ve already said to myself and I’m still saying it to myself, mmmkay. Because fear is a motha! And fear will have you living ya life exactly how you don’t want to. Trust me, I have been there and done that! I have discontinued my thoughts and my dreams already afraid of failing before I could even get started. “What if no one pays attention!” “What if no one likes it!” And all that otha bull! It took me years, I mean years to get out of my comfort zone. And truthfully, I’m still getting out of it when it comes to certain thangs. I’m really private. I’m not necessarily a open book to the world. I feel like social media is ova rated outside of making money. I don’t feel the need or want to share what I do in my personal life. My happiest most meaningful moments aren’t even shared on social media. For what? However, I know if I want my blog to reach a bigger audience I have to be a little more transparent. And honestly, that’s hard for me. When it comes to my blog. I stay, ummm safe. Yeah, I stay safe. Doing enough to just get by if you know what I mean. Expecting to flourish only because of the people that know me personally. And truthfully, complete strangers support me more. I finally made my Instagram account public. Which seemed to take me foreva to do. But I am proud of myself for taking that step because I have seen my blog views go up a lot since! Other bloggers, writers, and other creative people have hit me up as well. Which is pretty dope! I pray for endurance and consistency when it comes to getting the work done pertaining to all my goals. And yes, I became super motivated. Then I got pregnant. Being sick and laid up somewhat kind of forced me into bed, so I just read all day. We’ll only when I had the strength, that is. I studied, researched, and crammed my brain with blog this and blog that. Which is an immense amount of information that I had to jot down on paper or in my notes in my phone. Which by the way I love the notes app. I have all my what nots there. The blogging world is pretty huge tuh me. I have learned a lot and I’m still learning Chile.
Anyways. It came a time when I started to get fed up with myself. Like, I was getting on my own nerves. I know I can be doing more!! Which means, I should be doing more. And it’s me stopping me. Now, who can I blame when I’m the only thing standing in my own way? I started to get frustrated with myself because I blamed me for the lack of work that has not been getting done because I’m dog on scared. Which is a oxymoron because for me personally I rather try and fail at somethang then to wonder what if, if I neva tried in the first place. That is what really scares me! Wondering, what if. So, for me not to expand and really do me when it comes to RedLipstickandCammies is idiotic. When I know that I rather try and it all be a fluke, then to live in fear of not being successful at all. I just need to get my crap together, get my mind right, and forget the enemies antics. Yeah, I have a habit of calling myself out these days Chile.
As some already know, I am a SAHM (stay at home mom.) And I must say, I enjoy the hell out of it. I really do. Now I would be a liar if I said I didn’t miss working every once in a blue moon, because I do. Especially when I first moved out of state and got married. I’ve always been spoiled, true. But that has neva eva gotten in the way of me getting my grind on. I’ve always worked hard for what I wanted and what I had. So, when that stopped abruptly I was like, WHOA! After much conversation with my husbae and God, (of course.) I learned to be content. And in being content I really learned to be thankful and productive in what I actually prayed for. I’ve always wanted to be a writer, have my own website (blog.) But because I did work so much and so hard before I got married I never could do some of the thangs that really made my heart go BOOM! Being a SAHM gives me ample opportunity to love up on my family and be, be April. Plus! All the money that a blog, Pinterest, affiliate ads, etc. can bring in. I’m like clock in who?
But what I read, learn, and see, I allow fear to make me feel like it’s too far fetched for me. Like, out of arms reach. Then I see my Pinterest views go up, I see the clicks on my blogs post, and I see my subscriber numbers go way past my wildest dreams. SO YEAH, THE HELL WITH FEAR! AND FEAR CAN KISS THE DARKEST PARTS OF MY TAIL!! I won’t allow the devil to live in my mind rent free and tell me what I can and cannot do! Because I know if I don’t do this to my fullest potential I will wake up one day almost hating myself because I didn’t give my own self a chance!
So, I’m here to tell you, I don’t give a dog on if you want to sell zip lock bags! DO IT!! For your sake! Don’t allow fear to get in the way of all the blessings and possibilities that God has for you. Nothing happens if you don’t happen! Remember that!! GO! Go and do you! Start today. STOP putting everythang off until tomorrow. Because if you know like I know, tomorrow turns into days, weeks, months, and heck, even a year! And then what?! I mean really, then what?!
I don’t know about you! But I’m about to take charge and inventory ova my life! And watch me blow my own mind! #Affirmation.
KABOOM!
I’m Just Saying…
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