Okay! So, we all know the first step to a problem is admitting, and accepting that you have one, right? Well. *Clears throat.* Here I am, admitting that I have a problem. I AM ON MY PHONE WAAAAY TOO MUCH! And for real, for real! I’m on my own nerves about it. Like, its just ridiculous! I really don’t want to say it. But, April, girl, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. Everything I do, everywhere I go, my tail has to be on the phone. In line at the grocery sto (store,) on the phone. At the car wash, on the phone. At the bank, on the phone! Girl! Get off your phone for crying out loud! I would wake up in the morning, ain’t brush no teeth, washed no face, I ain’t prayed, told nobody good morning or nothing. One eye opened and the other one half shut, on Instagram. Now, that don’t make no sense right there!
Now, before I dog myself out too bad, I will say, I’m not talking on the phone when Rob is home. And it’s so cute, because all my family and friends know that I may go a little ghost when Rob is off. I may not talk on the phone while Rob is home like I do during the day when he is at work, because I be missing him, and I want to hang with him, and do family things with him, ya know. BUT, that doesn’t stop me from scrolling on Instagram, Snapchat, and now Pinterest. I scroll Pinterest now more than anything. Like, I have over 350 followers, and I really don’t know how. But, I ain’t mad about it though. I feel like since my Pinterest followers have gone up, I have some new followers reading my blogs. If you’re a Pinterest lover, then you know what I mean. So, when I say I’m always on my phone, I don’t mean that I am actually like talking on it. I’m just always on it doing something. I be binge scrolling on Pinterest, it’s terrible! It’s soooo bad. Then I hop my tail over to Instagram, and I’ll be liking pictures and what not. As soon as I be ready to get off, someone goes Live that I like on their page. It can be Shekinah Jo, or whoever and I be like, what they talking about? So, now I done got stuck watching that. And God knows! I have plenty to do during the day. And Lordy! Don’t let Snapchat be jumping! I ain’t even gonna get into all of that.
Rob is not a phone person at all. Rob is just not concerned with too much outside of a few things. Robs Facebook looks like something from 2011, literally. My husband is so out the loop, that he thought Khloe Kardashian was with the Tyga. But for real though, I love that about him. He is one of the reasons why I want to do what I’ve decided to do, and that is to stay off my phone so dog on much chile. I ain’t lying! Like, even right now, I’m out on the deck, talking to you, and my phone is in the house on the charger. By the way, I have a short in my charger. *Err* Whoever is texting and calling me right now, I will get back to them later. Naomi and Rob are having movie time/nap time. So, I have no distractions. And please believe me when I say that my phone is one!
I believe that each day, speaking for myself, should be, should be like growth! Does that make sense? I feel like everyday I should be better than what I was yesterday. Meaning, if I woke up late yesterday, and didn’t get done what I needed to get done, then today, I will. It’s a new day, and no time for excuses, new or old. So, today, I want to be on my phone a lot less than what I was yesterday. Talk about breaking bad habits. Everyday I get up and pray, read my word, sing my gospel songs, ya know. I like to start Naomi and my day right with high spirits, even if it’s, one of those days. That too was something I worked on for awhile, and now it’s second nature to get up every morning talking to Jesus. And guess what? Eventually, all this phone mess will fall down by the waste side too. Me building my relationship with God has changed me ALOT over the years. I can’t leave the fact out that Naomi has a lot to do with it too. Having her just pushes me more to want to be great.
Growing up mentally has made me self-aware, and just more mature. Now, self-awareness sucks! It sucks! The truth hurts and when you face it head on yourself its uncomfortable, very uncomfortable. But to me, you wont live a fulfilled life without it. Ya know, always pointing the finger and making excuses for our actions, but never making excuses for someone else’s. Did you read what I just said and understand it? Read it again. Point that I am making is this. If Rob was on his phone, as much as I am on mines, it would be a problem. So, why should I do it, right? See, I’m a firm believer when you love someone unconditional, it’s somethings that you shouldn’t do or say, period. Love is, what love does. And if I love you, I wouldn’t want to do anything to someone, that I wouldn’t want done to me. To me, there is no love without respect. So, in my growth I realized I was wrong, and that I needed to change that. I brought it up to Rob, and I could tell that he was proud of me for seeing myself. He never complains about it either. When were are eating or watching a movie he will comment, maybe, but other then that, he just rolls with the punches. I didn’t realize how much of a hypocrite I was being, or how selfish and self- centered I was. Robs phone can be in his pants pocket, the car, my purse, whatever. He just isn’t consumed in what everyone has going on. My brother and sister in law have called looking for his tail. How many of us have said we aren’t worried about what folks have going on, but they scrolling all day, I know I have! But how much of someone else’s business do you know about during the day? Chile, Rob would come home and I have about two, three stories lined up about people, whether I know the people or not. You would think Blac Chyna was my cousin after all that talking I done done about the situation she was in with Rob Kardashian. I’m just giving an example, although Blac Chyna has been a topic of discussion. Let’s just say that Rob listens because, happy wife, happy life. All Rob knows is whatever Rickey Smiley was talking about on the radio this morning on the way to work. If Rickey ain’t talking about it, or Gary ain’t spilled no tea, that man is out of the loop.
Thank God for Jesus! I am so thankful that each day I am working on me to be a better me. I love my daughter, and I care what she thinks of me. So, I have to stay two steps ahead to show and teach her, because she be watching my every move. I want to stay happily married, I want to be a good wife, not just a wife. I want to be a better friend etc. That’s why I don’t have time for other people and their dysfunctions, especially if they don’t want to change them. Cause you see how I’m over here trying to better myself! As small as something may seem, like me keeping my dang phone out my hands, can make me flourish in so many other ways. I also care what my husband thinks. So it makes me happy when he sees me changing for the better without him even addressing the situation. Anyone that knows me knows if it were the other way around, it would be a argument. So, there you have it. I am fitting to be cell phone free, well not free, but you know what I mean. Less cell phone, more me! All the times that I’m liking other folks pictures, and keeping up with what everyone else has going on, I can be focusing on something that is more beneficial to me and my family, whether it be BIG or small. Simple pleasures are life’s treasures. Remember that. Don’t live a life where you can dish it, but can’t take it. #IJS.
I believe that love starts with the foundation of respect. Now, of course you know God is the forefront of everything in my life. So, I’m not saying respect, falling second to God, and so on, and so on. How could I speak about all the love I have for my husband, if I don’t even respect him? Meaning, why would I settle in a situation or circumstance that I know I wouldn’t be okay with it if he did it to me. Like is said, love is, what love does. So, I am so thankful that God checked me enough, so I could check myself. Ya know.
I remember years ago I would stay on Robs case about not posting me on his Facebook. Mind you, I done already told you that Robs Facebook looks like 2011, literally. But, me being me, I felt like I was the exception to that. Like, boy, you better make a status about how much you love me. Childish! Why? What was the great significance in that? Now, I think it’s soooo cute how a guy will talk about his love one on social media. Cute little picture, heartwarming captions. See, I love that stuff. But why was the devil beating me all upside my head making me think Rob was, wack, for not doing that. Somebody tell me why, I use to be up in here tripping because this man wouldn’t write about me on his Facebook status. Yall, give me a minute. We need a moment of silence. I was crazy as a bed bug. What the world! That’s right! Not what in the world. But! What the world!!
As time went on, and my perspective on things started to change, I realize I was a fool walking. Rob is everything. I know I have it good!And I am truly blessed beyond my own understand. And here I am tripping over nothing! Nothing! I was mad because Rob didn’t speak about me when on social media. The more I talk about this here, I don’t know whether I should keep laughing at myself, or slap myself upside my head. I ain’t lying. I MEAN HE MARRIED ME FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!! He chose me to be his wife, in real life, and I’m worried about Facebook!! The devil will have you tripping out if you allow him too. Like, I couldn’t see the bigger picture over some tedious nonsense. That’s all it is, some nonsense!
Needless to say, that’s water under the bridge. I love the fact that my husband doesn’t have a care in the world about his status and the status of the next person. I like how I can get on social media and Rob isn’t always up there posting statuses and pictures, whatever. I mean, my man done inspired me. *Haha* Rob ain’t putting no pictures on the wall at home, so I know he ain’t posting a picture on no Facebook wall. HA! No, seriously though. See, the same thing that makes me love him, is the same thing I fussed at him about. You see how whatever you can be if you don’t check ya self?! Chile. So, long story short, I done broke up with my phone. I will no longer be consumed in what social media has to offer.
I’m so proud of me.
I love my quotes and sayings. I can be watching a TV show, and someone can say something, and I writes it right on down! I remember years ago I ran across the saying, “Excuses are the tools of the weak and incompetent. Used to build monuments of nothingness. Those who excel in it seldom excel in anything else but excuses.” I love that quote so much that I would get that thang tattooed on my body. I ain’t! I’m just saying!! That’s how deep and profound it is to me. That quote is so true though. See, I don’t have a problem with people not being perfect, because I ain’t, and will never be. But truth be told, I do have a problem with people, who want to be around me, and they ain’t trying to be great. We all make mistakes, or whatever, but I don’t like dealing with people who are stagnate in their bad ways. A lot of people know that they’re mess up and that they do messed up things, but they constantly make excuses for it. And for real, for real, I don’t want it around me. Let’s just be real. It’s levels to this. And nothing from nothing leaves nothing.
So, yeah, that’s one of my truths. I need to stay off my phone. When I turned 28 years old last week, I made a vow to myself to let go of somethings, change somethings, and to be better at somethings. It may seem so small, me being so adamant about me wanting to stay off my phone. But it’s a door opener for so many other things. I don’t ever want my husband to feel like he’s in a one sided relationship. Second, I don’t ever want to bring my daughter up to be a woman that I can’t even be myself. We’re going to be great together.
So, for all my sister/friends who hit me up during the day and I don’t text right back, ya’ll cut me some slack alright. I will no longer lay up in bed scrolling on my phone next to my husbae. I will only use my lap top, which doesn’t have any social media at all on it. I only will be blogging, studying, doing school work, and whatever else I gots going on. I will not be concerned with the drama that him, them, and they has going on. I won’t be concerned with what he is posting about her, cause I’ll be too caught up in how good my man treats me.
I value my husband and daughter. So, any distraction is a liability! Chile! I’m staying the heck off my phone! And that’s just that!
I pray that you will find something in you after reading this, big or small to change with no excuses. The most outrageous things can start from nothing. So never think that something small is not that big of a deal. It sucks when you have to call yourself out on something. The truth does hurt. Whether you hear it from someone, or you just know it for yourself.
But….
“No man is free, who has not mastered himself.”
Check yourself, before you wreck yourself….
#IJS
I’m Just Saying…..