“Women don’t need men like men need women.”
Say what!!!! I done heard it from the horses mouth! (A man.) I mean, it doesn’t make it golden or a fact but, I love my Uncle and I love that he was so, umm, so clear about his perspective on men and women. That’s pretty much all he said, he’s not much of a talker, so.
Okay, so what had happened was, I was having a conversation with my Uncle and Aunt one late Sunday morning, and we got on relationships, (Oh Lawd.) and of course that led to how men are, and how women are. I’ve had this conversation with many, many people, including men, and most of the time it’s a great debate. The guy always feels right, and I KNOW I’M RIGHT!!! *Haha* I enjoyed this conversation with my Uncle and Aunt, they have learned me somethings. (Inside joke, teehee.) The convo got pretty deep. Not in a bad way though, nothing like that. It’s just what my Uncle said that blew my mind. “In general speaking, some would say, including men, that men need women more than women need men.” And in all truth ya’ll, I was tripping at that fact that HE said that being he’s a MAN. I told him in that very moment that I could not believe he said that, and with so much certainty.
“Not a lot of men would say that, they may think it, but they wouldn’t dare say it.”
Now, my Uncle is probably thinking, “I ain’t got time for all that, blah, blah,blah” knowing him. *I’m laughing.*
It’s not so much of being impressed, but umm, I was in awe I guess, being he’s a male and he said that. So many men have pride and egos that they wouldn’t dare say they need anything, let alone a woman! So yeah, I guess that’s the word to use, in awe, in the fact that HE said it.
Now, this is no competition by far, okay! BUT. Let’s be real here! How many times do males and females go back and forth about males and females. (You get what I’m saying.) Seriously! Think about it. Almost any topic can turn into the double standard of men and how women couldn’t dare do the things men do. I’m talking about sexual things. Things like, if a woman were to have sex with two different guys in one week, she’d be a hoe, whore, slut trick bucket. Buuuuut, that wouldn’t apply to a man. Or how a men are so quick to call women “crazy” but it’s over looked at how a man will drive a women “crazy.”
So, yeah, that’s how the conversation started. I had made a statement about how I’ve seen, more than enough times men move on, as in, new relationships, SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS, after breaking a woman’s heart because of something they did absolutely wrong. Something that dare not happen to them. I have held friends (literally) while we both have cried because of something he did. But God knows what she would have been if she had did the same thing to him, that he did to her. For the record men, women aren’t “crazy.” They’re aren’t crazy! They’re hurt!!!
Hurt people, hurt people.
Does it make it right!? No. But what he did wasn’t right either. So. A man can go out, leave his children at home while he lies to get his penis wet. Go out and get a whole otha women pregnant, and then have the audacity to even talk about you to her. Now, you tell me what a women would be if she came home pregnant with another mans baby??? *Clears throat** I’ll wait!
She would be a whore (bleep) (bleep.) So unfair!! Sooooo unfair!! You know dog on well, if a women lied to go get poked, left her kids at home to get it, and then woke up pregnant the next day and had to tell her man, she’d get talked about worse then Khaila (Halle Berry) on Losing Isiah. Tell me I’m wrong! Why can’t men be labeled as the same thing, and it be meant!
Anyways! *Rolls eyes*
That’s that double standard mess I’m talking about! I have seen with my own two eyes a husband cheat on his wife, and everyone pretty much knew about it too. Heck, he got to the point where he probably hardly lied anymore. It was almost like second nature for him to be doing something he had no business doing. Doing something he’d be pissed off about if someone did it to his momma, sister, or daughter. Which I don’t understand that for the life of me either.
So yeah, women thought he was crap, and I reckon the men folk dapped him up for all the tail he got on the streets, and having a wife at home. But guess what? His wife started doing to him what he was doing to her. I likes to have lost my mind when everyone felt sorry for him! (When I say everyone, I’m basically saying men.) “You good man?” “Dang that’s messed up.”
Oh! Oh! But when he was doing it to her I guess it was all good, right? I can’t. I just can’t. And do you know the stupid fool left her. Chiiiii! When I tell you somebody could have bought me for a penny. A penny! She took his bull crap for years, and the one time she does to him what he’s been doing to her, he leaves like he’s been through hell and high waters. Good for her that he left. Get the heck on! And that fool ended up with a whole other family a year later like nothing never happened.
I mean, shoot, when Rob and me broke up, he moved on fairly quickly in Japan. Me on the other hand, I didn’t want to see another man. Let alone get to know one. He made my stomach hurt. I was like, dang, he loves me though. But he done moved on with life like I never happened. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I’m still trying to figure out what happened.
My God! My God! I couldn’t even imagine going through that as his wife. But women do. Women go through it all the time. I CAN NOT STAND IT! Hey, men need love too. I get it. I understand, trust me. I’m not attracted to the female species, so, I appreciate the man, my man. I’m not dogging a man out, weellll, you know what I mean. We as women should pray for our men more in my opinion. (A discussion for later.) But let’s just be honest here, if women do what men do, OPENELY, it would be a MAJOR problem. Not just for the man, but society itself. And I loudly said, openly, because I know that some men will be like, “But women do the same things!” and I’m not saying that women don’t. But I’m not talking about women right now!
I Just Saying…
For example! If a man is on base cheating on his wife, it’s like almost normal. But let that wife cheat. I’ll just leave this here….
A man will cheat, in many forms. Whether it be cheat, sex, and that’s it. (Not saying, that’s IT, like it’s no BIG deal, because it is! So please don’t take it as such!) Or, they may cheat and make a baby. Or he might have cheated while his wife, finance, or girlfriend was pregnant. Or maybe the fool was so trifling that he cheated on you with your sister, cousin, friend, or enemy!
A MAN! Will do allllll of that, leave you, or you may leave him, but watch, you gone (No typo.) You gone look up, just like that, and I say, just like that, because it will be months later, and his tail will have a full-on girlfriend! “What?” (I say in a confused little girls voice.) I do not understand for the life of me why men can get away with murder (Not literally) and move on unscathed. “What you mean unscathed? I pay my child support every month. And I get my baby whatever he/she needs.”
“Oh. Okay.” That would be my sly reply. And so what?! A man can move on and create a whole new family with a whole new woman, and be happily moved on with a woman who knows all the bull and still falls in love with him. While the women has to figure out all the pieces of the puzzle that he created. “Who’s going to want me with a kid(s)” etc. Men make so many choices for women. And women are suppose to just be okay with it. Emotionally, women are a reck after a mans recklessness. While he done found a whole other piece.
I don’t know your perception of me while you’re reading this, but, if you sense mad, you’re right.
But it’s all good though. I’m sure while the woman spends years trying to figure it out, while the man lives it up, that day will come like a herd of bulls when everything that man did stares him right in the eyes. While the woman has moved on, happily, receiving everything she’s been deserving of. I wonder how it feels for a sorry man to see a good man have what once was his. But he was too loose of a goose to take care of what was his. AND DON’T GET ME STARTED ON, “And you bet not have a man around my kids.”
Maaaaan listen Patna! Maybe that man can teach your kid(s) something that you couldn’t! Respect, loyalty, value, morals, and all that other stuff that he failed to have. Don’t nobody wanna hear all that noise. Fools be talking loud and saying nothing!
Quick question though?! How easy is it to just pay child support? Now, I know raising kids is a lot of money. I have one. But if feeding and clothing Naomi was all I had to do, I’d run circles around it. Men get mad about becoming part time dads and child support when they created the circumstances to the problem.
“You fussing and complaining about child support, but you cheated!!!”’
Now, I haven’t experienced anything as a married woman, so I will be very careful about my choice of words. I would never want to offend anyone with words due to something I haven’t experienced. But, I have been cheated on as someone’s girlfriend, a couple of times. And of course, it some how ended up being my fault. And they always moved on, while I still picked up the pieces to my heart they left me with. I have seen from close friends and/or associates, the pain, the detriment of being cheated on, and how they have to figure it out now due to someone else’s lack of respect for them. At the time and even after, I always think about them in a concerned way like, “Are they really okay?” It’s so bad when you see loved ones, and even people you don’t even know, go through something that you couldn’t even imagine making it through.
Men are so unfair, and some are even more cowards. It’s a sad day when you ditch the very thing you can’t take.
I have known and known of people who have taken their significant other back over and over and over and over again after they have stepped out on them. But, oh no! Don’t let her even bat a lash at a man at the red light. I bet my bottom dollar he’d leave her. Say I’m wrong!!! (Leave a comment if you like ?, lets chit chat.) It’s like a continuous slap in the face. I mean to see someone you love move on with someone else, after they broke your heart and made choices for you, that you never asked for in the first place has to literally make you throw up.
Some would say, “He’s her problem now.” But for real, for real. What the women is probably thinking (I have.) is that now he may actually get his crap together, and the next girl will reap all the benefits. I’ve had these thoughts in life before. I know!
My husbae and me go back and forth about this topic. I love how he gets my point and doesn’t think I’m wrong. I already know I’m not though. *Teehee*
All in all, he just feels like the guy shouldn’t have to live the rest of his life being judged based on that. And yeah, he’s right, the guy shouldn’t. But umm, the girl would! And you can’t expect people to just get over certain things you do to them. It takes years to forgive people. I think, from what I have experienced with men, is that, they can do something two months, or two years ago, and they think you’re supposed to get over it. But if it were them, they’d die mad about that, even if the rest of their life was happy.
If a woman came home and told her man she was pregnant by another man it would be a serious mess down, bust down situation! FOR REAL! But if a guy comes home and tells his woman that he has another woman pregnant, she is suppose to just take it. And God forbid if she goes “crazy.” And I say, take it because I’ve heard mean complain about a woman being “crazy” after he done drove her poor self “crazy.”
Now!! Let me just clear this up here. I’m not saying that woman don’t cheat!!! But like I said earlier, I ain’t talking about women right now!
I’m Just Saying….